Why I Don't Let Kids Come Here

[RKCoon]

(Note that I am duplicating this post for two separate places - AVA and VCN

I have a young friend, shes 16, just now learning about vampirism, and she asked me, where would be good sites to go to learn online?

My response - Not AVA, and not VCN.  Why?

To be blunt, too many people that I consider to be a risk to underage people. Nevermind JS and his legions that follow at all times, i mean active members. There are those here - and I doubt I need to name names - that have something of a reputation behind them, and those here whose actions back up such reps.  Now, for adults that already have an idea of what vampirism is and what to avoid, sure, both sites can be navigated, but for the younger folks? No chance.  Granted, this is aimed more at the VCN - but this does apply to AVA to an extent as well. The topics discussed here are generally advanced, mature subject matter,  and there are those here (both sites) I flat out simply would not trust with underage folks, either in their safety or simply telling them accurate information.

So tell me, with this in mind, two questions --

Is there places online that would be considered both safe and appropriate for those under age?

Is there something/s that can be done HERE to improve such situation, or is this simply an 18+ forum?

[NyteMuse]

Is there places online that would be considered both safe and appropriate for those under age?

Um, hrm...the place that comes to mind immediately is a place I highly suspect you would not be likely to recommend to anyone due to your personal bias against some of the people involved: VCMB.org
It specifically has teen-only sections, but seeing as how you tend to not recommend things attached to Sangi...what else can I think of...

Is the 16yo sang? Lono's forum, IIRC, is PG-13 for the most part, but obviously heavily geared towards psis, with the one hybrid section. Most of the adult topics are kept to 18+ groups, and I wouldn't say PV.org is advanced stuff only (in fact, I find more of the 101 stuff there).

Vampires.nu is the only other forum I can think of that offers good beginner stuff and generally PG-13.

Or send them to sites that only give information and don't allow for discussion, as that's where they're most likely to be at risk.

[AVA Staff]

AVA is strictly 18+ across the board.  Anyone under the age of 18 isn't technically supposed to even be registered to this site nor participate in the discussion.  Our offline functions are 21+.  This is NOT the support site I'd recommended for minors (was never designed or staffed for such).

[sphynxcatvp]

When you say places online, do you mean sites in general, or forums?

[RKCoon]

Well, both, or each perhaps if necessary. Mert, I read ya.

[childofthespiral]

I haven't been active here very long, but I'm wondering who here would possibly be dangerous towards a minor. Mean or hateful, maybe, but dangerous?

[Nadia115]

It is scientifically known that through much of teen years a portion of the brain is still dormant. It is the portion that keeps us adults from doing stupid and dangerous things. Well, at least for those who DO use their whole brain. So when you ask a teen why they did something super stupid or dangerous what they were thinking, they literally were not as that part of the brain is not active yet. There are many who would not set aside ideas and such that they hold far too dear and just stick with the facts that could get a kid hurt. Add to the fact that they are so impressionable and tend to take things to heart far too much, mean and hateful can be very harmful for them. Plus both RK and I have had PMs from some that could be harmful to a child and the fact there are JS supporters said to be spies here and other places that really do not need to be any where near young teens...this is not a place for them at all. So yes, many of these places can be dangerous for a young teen.

[childofthespiral]

I understand that AVA and this board are 18+, no exceptions, and I fully support that. I just didn't realize there were people around here that would actively try to cause harm to a child.

That makes me shudder.

Anyway, what about the old standby sanguinarius.org? I haven't been over there in years (literally) but wouldn't they be able to give some information to a teen who might actually be trying to better themselves? I mean, I wish I'd known at 16 most of what I know now. I wish I'd had access to the information I learned from later on. Wouldn't have sone half the stupid stuff I did if I'd been better educated.

[AVA Staff]

The administration is not aware of any particular individual on this forum who has expressed behavior that would endanger a child.  There is a higher concentration of adult topics on this forum and most topics are not moderated.  For these reasons alone this is not a "kid" friendly forum.

[sphynxcatvp]

I have information on my site that is useful for both adults AND teens, both vampire-related AND medical (because the number of times I have to bitchslap someone for not thinking of the medical side of things FIRST....argh.) Everything on my site is open to all since I'd rather a teenager learn how to do something with a modicum of safety instead of guesswork. And each article is labeled with the author's name, so that people can find the ones they like, or skip the ones they don't like - everyone has their own philosophies and all.

(I have the same attitude towards things like sex education, too. Something that puts me at odds with many conservatives.)

[Nadia115]

Not saying that anyone would outright go to cause harm intentionally. As in seeing a kid and thinking "Oh I could so mess them up"...but could misguide a kid out of their own beliefs, or own misguidance. That and not keeping in mind they are a kid. BAH...long week already....

[childofthespiral]

I agree with what Sphinxcat said. Teenagers are gonna look for sources of information from somewhere, and the fact that they're still kids isn't gonna stop them from looking. I'd rather they read from a rather adult oriented forum (not necessarily this one. I respect AVA's 18+ policy) that has accurate information than getting misguided information from soneone who doesn't have their safety and best interests in mind. Like SP said about sexual education... if not teaching teenagers anything at all about sex, how it works, and how to prevent STD's and babies, then no one under the age of 18 would ever have sex or have babies or STD's, yet they do and have for as long as there have been people. My grandmother was never taught what sex was or where babies came from or how her mother got pregnant with 12 more babies after she was born. She wasn't even told why her mother was getting larger for 9 months, where her mother went to for 1 month, and why when she came back, she was skinny again and carrying an infant. Yet my grandma was married and 4 months pregnant when she was 16, and a mother of 5 when she was 23. (For the record, my grandma was born in a 2 room, dirt floor log cabin that her dad built, on the side of a mountain about 5 miles north of the Kentucky Tennessee state line)

Not educating teenagers properly who really want to know what vampirism is isn't gonna keep them safe from people who might feed them incorrect information about what vampirism is, and it isn't gonna keep them from accidentally or intentionally harming themselves or each other.

[SilverRose]

Im confused when did this forum become 18+ i was 16 i think when i joined, of course that doesnt say much coming from me ive always been more mature than my age would suggest, but anyway is this recent or did i just slip through a rope?

[WingedWolfPsion]

Actually, I know plenty of teens who are perfectly capable of recognizing and avoiding stupid or risky behavior, and plenty of adults who aren't.  Many teens are naive, prone to experiment, and haven't yet developed a sufficient degree of cynicism to be properly skeptical of everything they're told, however.

But yes, VCMB is probably the best place for teens to get information.  It's relatively safe.

[Fledgling]

I am probably waaaaaay off topic here, but why do the kids feel the need to research us?? is it because of Twilight, New Moon, Vampire Diaries, Buffy, Angel etc?? i have heard a lot of kids say "oh i sooo wanna be like Edward OMG", I am 29 now but i always knew i was different, i always had a craving for blood and my senses were always hightened for as long as i can remember, but i always tried to ignore it all until i was attacked and then my system went nuts, i now accept what i am and yet i still feel no real "urge" to research